🧟♀️🧟♂️ Hey there, Zombified Wanderer!
So, remember that time I got hooked on “The Walking Dead” and binged the entire thing, talking about nothing else at brunch for weeks? Yeah, me neither. But somewhere between Glenn’s heartache and Michonne’s sword skills, I had a terrifying realization: we’ve got real zombies among us. And not the fun kind that you can outrun in stylish sneakers. We’re becoming the soulless, droning, tech-addicted version, one bad habit at a time. Time for a zombie check!
- 📱Constantly Scrolling Social Media: Do you open Instagram every 2.5 seconds, hoping the algorithm magically changed and your ex’s photos won’t be on your feed? Honey, that constant scrolling’s dulling your sparkle.
- 🍟 Junk Food Overload: Remember that summer we went on a fry-only diet? It was fun until my skin started looking like I’d been deep-fried. Eating junk non-stop makes you feel and look… well, zombified.
- 😴 Not Prioritizing Sleep: Remember how we pulled all-nighters in college and thought we looked “fresh”? LOL. We looked like zombies. Sleep is your body’s restart button. Use it.
- 🛋️ Couch Potato Syndrome: Netflix and actual chilling is fun until it’s not. Get up, dance, take a walk, or do the Macarena! Just move!
- 🚫 Avoiding Sunlight: Okay, so maybe sparkling in the sun is only for Twilight vampires, but a bit of Vitamin D can uplift your soul. And no, turning up the brightness on your laptop doesn’t count.
- 🥤 Living Off Caffeine: Three coffees before noon? Gurlll, you’re not waking up; you’re charging like a faulty battery that’s gonna conk off soon.
- ❌ Neglecting Self-Care: If your idea of self-care is re-watching sad episodes of “Grey’s Anatomy,” we need to talk.
- 💬 Gossip-itis: Spending all your energy on who said what about whom? Redirect that passion, detective! Maybe try figuring out who keeps stealing my snacks from the office fridge?
- 🔄 Saying Yes to Everything: Spreading yourself too thin? Trying to be everywhere and do everything? Slow down, superstar! Even zombies get to rest when they’re not, ya know, craving brains.
🌟 Here’s the Tea: It’s time to snap out of the trance and start living like the bright, radiant, utterly NON-zombified soul you are. Shake off these habits, put on some glitter, and dance your way out of Zombieland! 🎉🕺🧟♀️🙅♀️🎶
I’m a philosophy dropout with a PhD in Literature. I covet a cabin full of cats, where I can write fantasy novels to pay for my cake addiction. Sometimes I live in castles.